Isn't it worth to Wait ?

Listening to "Tinka Tinka" song from the movie "turning 30". It's a beautiful song and I cud actually relate to it. There comes a time in life when u actually, truly feel aloofed inside and out. No one approves your decisions as you've become dependent on them, living in their house. I have been realising this thing since I've quit my job. Till the time, I had my job and used to nod at every thing my parents used to tell me, I was a good daughter. My decisions were approved. But, now since I am jobless, don't have a boy friend who wants to marry me or (whome I want to marry), surving alone, Now I have become good for nothing in everyone's eyes. I can't take my decisions. I can't go for outing with my friends. People come and tell me that I am ruining my life sitting idel at home and to make it worse they advice me to get married as soon as possible to whomesoever my parents approve.

Don't I have the right to choose a guy for myself just becoz I'm jobless and getting old? Rather than spending next 30 years of mysery with a person, isn't it worth to wait for the right person to come and spend some less years (but happy moments) with the one I love. I don't know, where life will lead me but I know I will fight till I live and will marry only the one whome I find suitable for myself. Rightnow, I urgently need a job, so that I can move out of my parents home and live on my own.

The Alchemist

Hi All !

It's been long time, since I wrote. Actually, a lot had been going on in life though, but I didn't feel like writing. After 4 months of brainstorming that what I actually want, now I've decided to prepare for govt. job like a Bank job or so.. a it will be good from long term perspective. Moreover, I think, I'm done with the corporate culture and can't continue like this for long.

Next, I read the book: "Alchemist". The Alchemist details the journey of a young Andalusian shepherd boy named Santiago. Santiago, believing a recurring dream to be prophetic, decides to travel to the pyramids of Egypt to find treasure. I had heard a lot about the book and it's really worth it. Here are some lines from the book which, I loked the most:

"I'm like everyone else - I see the world in terms of what I would like to seehappen, not what actually does."

"Making a decision was only the beginning of the things. When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision."

This one is my favorite: When the boy meets the gal "Fatima" - love of his life and how she expresses her immense trust and love to him: "I am a desert woman, and I'm proud of that. I want my husband to wander as free as the wind that shapes the dunes. And, if he does not returns, I will accept the fact that he has become a part of the clouds, and the animals and the water of the desert."

Quote No 4: "Everything that happens once can never happen again. But everything that happens twice will surely happen a third time."

And the last one: "It's true; life really is generous to those who persue their destiny"

These were few of the quotes, I hope, you liked them. Will be sharing more updates soon. Till then, Love you all and wish u a Very Happy and Safe Holi. Enjoy!!

Confused or Scared? Trying to figure it Out ..

So, finally am relieved from my organisation and it's a bit relief. The weekend was great as I met my old B.N.A.G.S. members: Mrs. S and Mrs. B.. It sounds so strange no. Well, we enjoyed a lot. Now am sitting at home and again the dilemma has started surrounding me. I'm still confused and clueless what exactly I want in various areas of my life. I know, I overthink stuff sometimes, but I need to get it out in any case. So, back to the topic, what I exactly want? Let's start with career. Then, I'll discuss other areas.

Career: Sometimes, I think that I'm done with all what I'd ever wish to achieve and don't want to work anymore. But at the next moment, I think no, I want to be independent as I can't ask my parents for money. It's against my ego or self respect(you might say).

Marriage: Now comes the next hot topic. Well, I will admit that I've always dreamt of that fairy tale and have been waiting for the Mr. Right. But, sometimes, I think no I can't shackle myself to anyone for lifetime, it will suffocate me. Oh god, how horrible.

Partner: If people ask me that what kind of partner you want? I can't explain it. As sometimes even an ordinary looking man attracts me while on the next moment I want a high profile person, whome I can respect and introduce to everyone as if I've won a trophy. Lolz..

Driving: This is the last and the recent concern. My parents ask me to learn driving. Even I want to do that so that I can drive wherever I want to but something incide me holds me back to do so as am scared of accidents.

So, in short, I am not able to understand whether I am confused or scared? Can't I make decisions or are my fears overwhelming me? Really, I need to get a job fast I suppose. Till then, I'll try to figure it out, what I want?

Trip to Port Blair

Hi All!

Recently, I visited Port Blair with my family. The place is very beautiful and will suggest you all, that do visit at least once. Here are some pics:

Mann nahi lag raha bilkul bhi :(

Well a lot is going around me and in my head these days which worries me sometimes. While on one moment I think, I need not to worry as everything would be fine in few days, it causes a strange kind of anxiety sometimes. For instance:

I am waiting to be relieved from this hell (my present organisation). They are not paying me as I have to serve the notice period and I've broken the one year bond. This is driving me crazy almost as I'm left with no money now.

Secondly, people are trying to get into my nerves as they ask me when are you planning to get married? As if they have to arrange for the dowry money.. What the hell.. I definitely will get married, once I find a suitable guy who finds me suitable for himself as well (as it should be from both the sides.)..

Third, I have very little balance in my mobile, that's the most important issue as I can't call my friends as frequently as I used to and can't give missed calls every time as it is against my ethics. No offences to those girlfriends who have boyfriends who call them back on giving missed calls.

So, in short, I'm not feeling good at all about anything. It's the time to grab a chocolate, I suppose. And thanks for bearing a ranting post..

Take Care,
Ann

Hope Continues... What's Next ??

Listening to the song: "Noor-E-Khuda" from the movie "My Name is Khan." Some songs, fragrances or incidents always remind us of some special people who touched our lives at some or the other point of time. Likewise, this song reminds me of all my friends, best of friends and acquitances, who came in my life, gave me some sweet memories and then left behind the incomplete stories, cut communication, misunderstandings, anger and much more! Sometimes, I think whether I will be able to meet them again in my life? Would I be able to tell them, that how did I felt at that point of my life when they left? or is this the end of it all? the mystery continues.. but the hope is always there. My sub conscious mind tell me that .. no it's not the end of it. I'll meet them in heaven or hell (God knows)..or may be in my next life. And then, it reminds me of the last scene in the movie "Titanic," where Rose (the lead actress) looks back to find Jack (the lead actor) waiting downstairs for her. So, will it happen with me as well? Will I be able to meet my loved ones and pals in heaven? The question remains unanswered yet. I don't know when the mystery will resolve but the hope continues.....

Random

Nothing much to share. Feeling a bit aloof as Alps has left for her city. Soon, she'll be getting married and will enter a new phase of her life. So, god bless her. Right now, everyone in the office is planning for tomorrow's Diwali Party. However, am not quite excited. Missing all my pals. Last year, I remember we had a blast in our last office with our "gang of gals". But, the scene has completely changed this year. Am in new office. Though I've made many friends here, most of them would be on leave tomorrow so I don't have anyone to crack jokes on others. I know am a bitch who's always looking forward to bitch about others. Lol. Anyway, I had to take it out. Miss you all: Pinks, Alps, Guy with beautiful hair :) and others too.

Here is a beautiful pic. dedicated to all my loving friends. and yeah, Wish you all a very Happy Diwali :)



Take Care and Enjoy!

Love,
Ann